If
you've already read part 1, looked at the title, or follow me on social media,
you probably know that I recently returned with my family to the place where my
mom was born, Puerto Rico. Mom has a friend, Orlando, who happens to own a nice
speed boat (he's also won competitions around the island when it comes to the
fastest boat so that's cool!). Every time we go down, a drive to the southern
town of Salinas is always on the to-do list to see Orlando. My parents, Titi
Alba, my younger cousin Barbara, and I all packed up and drove down to Salinas
and loaded up the boat. Orlando took us out to a clump of mangrove trees that
was shallow where boaters like to go and camp out on sunny days. There were
about twenty boats on the day that we went. (Side note: we tied our boat up
next to one of the boats belonging to a friend of Orlando's who told me that I
was so white that I blinded him). We spent the day looking for shells, eating
snacks, swimming around, and relaxing in the water. At about 5 we left for a restaurant
that waited for us a little bit further down the coast. While we were at the
restaurant, Barbara and I spotted this beautiful sunset falling into place. We
went out and snapped some pictures and just stood watching it. As the sun sank
lower, Orlando and my family walked toward us saying they were ready to jump
back in the boat and head back. Personally, I was a little intimidated by the
idea of Orlando driving back as dusk turned into night (especially after how
many beers I'd seen him down that day... don't worry though, it was a safe
number I think). The boat had two lights to indicate to other boat drivers that
we were in fact a boat... a very fast-moving boat, but there was no big
spotlight to see what was directly in front of us and I had no idea how he knew
where he was going. But I stretched my arm out over the edge of the boat, a
practice that I often replicate while driving down the road on those days that
I want to feel weightless. As the boat bounced over waves, I felt like I was
flying. Then I looked up and saw a sight that took my breath away - dozens of
stars twinkling down at me. I kept my eyes glued on the sky until we got back
to the dock. At one point, I turned around and was in awe at the collection
that had been forming behind me. Behind me was every star I had seen. Above me
were a few more to add to the collection. However, in front of me, there were
almost no stars as they were covered up by dust in the air... but as we got
closer to this empty void, I saw even more stars. It brought me to the
realization that is similar, but slightly different from the conclusion I found
in part 1. I could look at the past, everything that had come before that
moment. It was beautiful and some stars shone brighter than others. The stars
directly above me in the present were not as numerous or as brilliant looking
as the display behind me, but I knew they would only add to my experience
later. The stars in my future were unclear... it was dark and intimidating and
I didn't like focusing on it. When it boils down to relating to life, you can
always look back and see all the good and bad that has come before and see the
beautiful picture that is your life. You can look at your unknown future,
knowing it will be even more magnificent than your past, but it's scary to
focus on and should not be focused on 24/7 unless you want to be driven mad by
that void. Lots of us, especially speaking for myself, find ourselves in a
place that we don't necessarily like. It's not as beautiful as the past. It's
hard and life might just suck. I want to focus on the future or the past to
escape the present. However, none of my efforts will change the reality. The
stars above me are going to add to my collection of stories and I just have to
deal with the hardships right now and wait patiently to see what kind of beauty
and good that God will bring out of it. But no matter how bright a
certain star shines, each is important and adds to the breath-taking beauty
that I will see one day when I look back at my life… beauty that you could see when
you look back at yours.
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